When I was a kid, I used to dread the first day of school.
Not because of homework or teachers… but because of my name. Yup, it’s true.
Every year, the teacher would stop mid-roll call, squint at the list, and hesitate. Then they’d take their best guess… and the class would laugh. Every. Single. Time.
I hated it. It made me want to disappear.
I wasn’t a bad kid or a quiet genius, just shy. I kept to myself because being noticed usually meant being embarrassed or picked on. I’m sure my story isn’t that different from that of many of you.
As I got older, though, something shifted. I started realizing that having a different name, being a little different 𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭, wasn’t a curse. It was actually kind of cool. It made me unique. It made me empathetic.
Because once you’ve felt what it’s like to be misunderstood or left out, you never forget it.
Fast forward a few decades… now I spend my days talking about how medical practices can, and should, become more empathetic. How it doesn’t just benefit patients, but that it feels good to clinicians and staff too. I help healthcare teams make patients feel seen, safe, and cared for.
But if I’m honest, I think the reason I focus on empathy is because I’ve had to work hard to show it myself. I’ve always cared deeply about people, but I didn’t always know how to 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸 it. What I was feeling inside for people didn’t always find its way out to the person I intended it for. Sometimes we preach to others what we have always struggled with ourselves.
And I don’t think I’m alone in that. A lot of people in healthcare feel the same. Inside, we want to connect. We want to help. But there’s a gap between what we feel and what we express. Maybe we hide behind the science and data. Maybe we were the smart nerdy kid and never quite learned to connect with others as well as we wanted to.
That’s why empathy matters so much. It bridges that gap. It turns “I care” into something people can 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭. And in healthcare, we need to step up and get past our old ghosts. People need us, that’s what we signed up for.
So maybe empathy isn’t just something we teach. Maybe it’s something we find; in the quiet places inside ourselves that remember what it felt like to be small, nervous, and unseen. Maybe we can find it within ourselves to step out of our old scared selves and grow into the person we wished had reached out to us a long time ago.
Because at the end of the day, that’s what most people want, isn’t it? To be seen, heard, and cared for. And sometimes, even the smallest act of kindness is enough to make them feel that way.
👉 Have you ever noticed that the thing you teach others is the thing you’ve struggled with yourself?